Extended sign-off mnemonics

These days it’s quite common for messages on social-oriented bulletin boards to end with signoffs like “Hi and hugs to everybody.” In fact, this has become so popular that as much as 7.5% of the disk space on some BBS’s is currently devoted to this particular comment. The International Committee for Relatively Pointless Abbreviations and Badly Misspelled Acronyms (SPUDS) has just released a new, internationally approved list of abbreviated signoffs. These include:

ooo hugs
xxx kisses
OOO big hugs
XXX big kisses
oo hugs for everybody but you
OO! big, excited hugs
CCC hugs for people you can’t quite reach around
OOQ hugging with tongue
xx@ kisses and earlobe nibbling
zzz snoring
yyy anything that occurs between kissing and snoring
H handshake
kkk Alternate form of “handshakes for all”
KKK White robes for all
AAA talk-show not-really kissing
[X] kissing in the closet
XYZZY a kiss that moves you
MMM Same as WWW, but from inversion boots
LLL Armwrestles for all
OOO~~~ Big hugs and large caterpillars for all
))) Smiles for all
TTT Trees for all
jjj gooses for all
JJJ big gooses for all
OOOXXXYYYZZZ This is illegal before marriage in nine states
OOOXXXyZZZZZ Still illegal, but generally not nearly as well received

Remember, there is much more work to be done to codify and abbreviate excessively clear and understandable sign-off messages and replace them with efficient and incomprehensible international symbols. Please contribute money, suggestions, and chocolate to this worthy cause, and help make conversation boards a better place for assembly-language programmers.


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